Young Adult Gifts

"All I ask is a chance to ruin my life in my own way."

'This is a good time to be young, son. Look at all the opportunities you have in front of you...you can help sole the problems of the environment, poverty,civil rights....'

'I don't have to leave the nest! I can stay on your health insurance until I'm 26!'

"Your room is exactly how you left it before you went to college, except of course, for our boarder, Mr. Grunze."

'I think my parents want me to move out.'

'You can stick your filthy shell. I'm listening to the Arctic Monkeys.'

'After I get my MBA I'll live in New York and summer in Europe before moving back in with my parents.'

He's waiting for the Metaverse to begin!

An ellipsis in the sky

'Glastonbury? You've been up to no good in some young man's bedsit, haven't you! Mud sticks, y'know.'

"So what happened between you and Estella?"

"He SAYS that's his classroom, but looks to me like he's found some old reruns of Hollywood Squares!"

A teenager imagines how the world looked prior to the invention of the internet

"I think the most rewarding part of caring for elderly parents is when they call you because they don't want to bother the 9-1-1 people."

"May we live in interesting times. And may we outlive them."

The day the cat realized it was dependent.

'Are we broke yet?'

"Mom, please! I'm a married woman whose friends have been reviewed favourably by the New York Times."

"Yeah, you could say I've got mother issues....she told me I have to move out!"

PREPARING A POMEGRANATE FOR DUMMIES

Peter

"Tell us the one about swift justice, Grandpa."

"Your mother and I think it's time you got a place of your own. We'd like a little time alone before we die."

"Your mother and I want to make your 21st birthday a moving experience. We'll help you pack."

"No, I want to know the meaning of never calling your mother."

"No, four glasses of water was enough. . . now I have to go to the bathroom!"

"If I had known how adult her place was I would have brought nicer beer."

Bob began seeing his mother, who gave him up for adoption, professionally, three times a week. It didn't help much.

'Male, 38, still living with his parents. They asked us to keep him overnight, so they could change the locks.'

"Your old Jewish mother with some pickled herring, sir. To remind you of your roots,"

'I blame my parents, they never set me any standards worth rebelling against.'

'Sorry, sweetie -- they're not that kind of cookies.'

The end of innocence

My Folks, dressed up like Eskimos

'I want to go out of town so that I can become a fully independent person, but near enough so that I can bring my laundry home.'