Parenting Young Adults Gifts

"He's at that awkward age - not completely out of the house but no longer a tax deduction."

Next gen pregnancy tests.

"Yeah, you could say I've got mother issues....she told me I have to move out!"

"That table is yours once that party decides to move to the suburbs."

'This is a good time to be young, son. Look at all the opportunities you have in front of you...you can help sole the problems of the environment, poverty,civil rights....'

'You can stick your filthy shell. I'm listening to the Arctic Monkeys.'

Toddler Feeding Solutions

"No, four glasses of water was enough. . . now I have to go to the bathroom!"

"All I ask is a chance to ruin my life in my own way."

Pinata good bags.

"Me? I thought you were raising them."

'Oh my Gawd! He's a weed!'

'One advantage of living through the plagues and wars of the 14th century was that you didn't have to study Chaucer.'

"When we grow up we can eat snacks BEFORE dinner and call them hors d'oeuvres!"

'Sorry, sweetie -- they're not that kind of cookies.'

Early Night Club

Kindergarten Primary School Teacher

"So what happened between you and Estella?"

Baby eating "Uploading", Baby on toilet "Downloading"

"Your room is exactly how you left it before you went to college, except of course, for our boarder, Mr. Grunze."

'At first his nose ring irritated me, but then I made him tie a string to it. Now I can lead him around.'

'Are you sure I should read my book report to the class? --�It's PG-13.'

'The fifth rule of parenting. . . cross that bridge when you come to it.'

Curious George, Dad

"You should wear your glasses, Sven."

An ellipsis in the sky

Pop in the 3rd movie. I used to like Kevin Costner. Brew the 5th pot of coffee. Fair trade: sleep for caffeine. Take turns as sentry. Do not ring. Do not ring. Do not ring

Childhood's End

May 2004: Crack of 4:00 AM / May 2020: Crack of 4:00 PM

'We lease the children, of course!'

Praise works best when it comes straight after the positive behaviour.

'I hope to raise enough money to buy my own house and move out at sixteen!'

'After I get my MBA I'll live in New York and summer in Europe before moving back in with my parents.'

'I think my parents want me to move out.'

'Honey, before you go out tonight, I would like to have a little chat with the prince of darkness.'