Work-averse Strategist Gifts

I tossed a coin to decide between playing golf or going to work. I had to toss the coin four times.

"Yeah, but that one's a little bit hard to reach."

"Be patient. He'll have to visit the water cooler sooner or later."

"We offer a generous flex time policy - you can work your 90 hours per week any way you'd like."

"Haven't you wondered why I live about 50 years longer thank you?"

A cat is hiding in a block of cheese to lure a mouse out of its hole.

Sad boss: "This one pretty much sums it up."

"Game of checkers? Okay, but I'm watching every move you make."

"Sir, your new campaign manager is here."

"It's a long-term strategy to make them lazy and complacent first."

"Your blood pressure is too high. Take two of these."

Workaholics anonymous open all day every day.

Success

'Unfortunately our definition of 'job' differs.'

Facebookie - Odds on boss catching you wasting time

The night before the big meeting Frank receives a visit from the PowerPoint Fairy

"I'm incredibly happy - must be the medication speaking."

"It would keep me awake all night, but I'm up for a game of coffee pong first thing in the morning."

'I'd have a lot more of em if it weren't' for some jerks always looking for peaceful situations.'

"I don't even like toys. I just do this so people won't talk to me."

'Well you know the old saying... if you can't beat 'em you can always google someone who can.'

Live to work or work to live?

"I work too hard, I think I need to spend more time with the children... Do we have any?"

Young man asking his governer to buy him a commission in the army

Napoleon 'Snuffed Out' by the Russians

The team leader conserved energy at odd moments.

"Testing the "I could do this job in my sleep" theory."

Think: Everyone's out to get me.

War and War

Office talk: 'I deal with stress management the easy way, I let management get stressed while I take it easy!'

Don't sweat the small stuff

"I forgot to call in dead."

Dealing with Change.

TRUST: "Are you telling me that none of you knows what it means?"

You pitched great, kid, but I'm bringing in the southpaw.