Woodcraft Wonder Gifts

'This was a natural progression from whittling actually.'

Claus 2.0

'Junior's writing has improved. His letters from college pleading for more money, are froceful and flawlessly written.'

'Take two eyes of newt, and call me in the morning.'

'Brian's saved us a small fortune...making all our own furniture!'

Whittler's Mother.

'No spell-check?? And you call this HEAVEN??'

Like father like son.

"Be or be not. There is no question."

"Look at the state of this place! Don't you ever use that thing to sweep up?!"

'There's one app we can't give you ... aptitude.'

Man building a tree house

'I told you to not get Danny that Junior Carpenter set.'

'It was only a five minute job. Not worth changing out of his best clothes for'

"I'm the ghost of woodshop past."

"Most projects require three hands."

Will Self deprecation

Kenny's mom always made his lunch.

'..and one for the pot.'

'I must admit, this family reunion hasn't really lived up to my expectations.'

Dating in Oz

"Larry made that chair from a pile of sticks."

Why you should never leave a sander alone in a locked room.

"I can't have the wart removed, I just got the Wicked Witch role in 'Wizard of Oz'."

'Just measuring you for the breakfast nook.'

'Word came from on high that managers had to develop their IT skills...'

Members of the Luddite community carving computers from solid blocks of oak and maple

"I'm Hygienia, the good witch of the north."

Reality home-improvement show.

'Leonardo's Lament' - 'I have nothing to do.'

Matins 10 AM Open Pulpit

Carpenter

"Do you like eye of newt in your Mac 'n' Cheese?"