Wood Stove Fan Gifts

Environmentally Friendly Technology: The wood burning key machine.

'Garfield has told the oil companies to go to hell.'

Barbeque Casualty.

Ode to a Grill

Turtle Trailer Court

'Do you want me to get the fish bone out, or not?'

'The stage hypnotist was great, he regressed Jeff to a previous life, and discovered that he was a layabout then, too.'

Bird collecting furniture for it's home.

"Over millions of years, carbon turns to diamond. Yet it took dad plus his grill mere minutes to turn last night's marinated chicken into that carbon."

'I'm not sure which I like best - the fake fire or the fake man with brandy glass in front of it.'

'Hold on, Bob. I'm downshifting.'

"It's beautiful. I'm just not sure it's $800 beautiful."

Hen, pig and cow sunbathing turn into fried egg,bacon and burger.

"Wow, Grog, fire and drawings. This is quite an entertainment center you have here."

Portrait sweating above a fireplace

'An no one heard him scream when they screwed on the pump and slowly drained all his vital fluids...'

"Hmmm. Not sure it will go with my wife."

'Gurkenman! The fact that you've got a height-adjustable desk does not mean that you've been promoted into a higher position!'

"My meeting take away was this chair, what did you get?"

'Uh, Jake, I believe that should be 'and the skies are not cloudy all day,' not 'and we pour ourselves more Chardonnary.''

Lin-Manuel Miranda

Now that we can't afford heating oil our pension check is finally good for something.

"Don't be fooled. Chaos reigns."

"And what do you think will happen if you do get on the couch?"

'You know, dad...a campfire is nature's TV, but with only one channel.'

Ecological electricity

"Carpenter ants."

'What did I tell you about feeding your pet beaver table scraps?'

"Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom or night will stop Ed from overcooking the fish."

'Hey, Mr. Harris, I've got your fresh fire wood here, where do you want it?'

Woodpecker Carving Chair out of Tree.

Dog in front of fire, wearing slippers, reading paper, smoking pipe, with tea and bones. Owner says: 'Stay!'

8th Annual Chainsaw Carving Competition

Fur'niture

"I envy you. I'd love to have a house with a fireplace."