Witty Shoppers Pillows

'I think Gramma's a saint for taking you school shopping.'

Three card brag - I'm great! I'm really handsome & I'm very rich.

They get into debt so fast these days...

Don't tell my wife. Dragon head.

'The worst thing about it is I'm claustrophobic.'

Seven deadly sins shopping plaza

Child praying - asks god to bless his family and the new motorbike he's bought with his father's credit card.

'I handed over my company to my son and he's doing better than I ever did. Unfortunately he's starting school next year...'

House Broken.

A sign outside the "Museum of Modern Gift Items" reads "T-shirts of the Masters Sale".

'How do I know if it's seaworthy?'

'Oxygen with that swimsuit ma'am?'

"Why does your men's clothing store need a loan?" "During the pandemic sales of pants have dropped way off."

Shop assistant falling in love with a customer

"So the only way to save the economy is to spend what we haven't got - plus ca change - moin ca change!"

Man stands in front of rows of kangaroos next to a sign that reads "Final Clearance - Entire stock of kanagroos".

Santa checking out sleigh beds.

Thong World.

"If there are more than two people in front of you - we will open another superstore."

'When will you learn? You're only paying for the label!'

"... And you said this was you and your husband's first time shopping at Costco?"

'He must be the real Santa... He was the only sober guy at the Xmas party!'

"Do you have something that says, 'Quit stalking me'?"

Poor Holiday Gift Choice...The Lucifer 2500, Talking GPS Device.

"I hope you've come home with something for your wind."

"I'm not sure. Maybe it's my wife's butt size I'm thinking of!"

"Classic ballcap $79.95. White, black, red or blue. Adjustable. One size fits all."

"Sometimes I like to browse the men's section just to screw with the patriarchy."

Mail-Order Yard Sale

"This new grocery store is divided into two sections: organic and things I can afford."

"Thank YOU Amazon!"

'Sometimes I ask myself, 'What would good King Wenceslaus think about all this?''

Mother Nature's Health Foods

'I should have told you about the side effects. Anyway, I think it looks really good small.'

"You want the extended warranty for this disposal razor."