Wintertime Humorist Gifts

Snowman's Funeral.

"Oh no, Doris. . . not implants!"

"All natural snow cones for sale."

'There's old Jim off to the shops. Slowed down a lot these days, ain't he.'

"No, Doris, not implants!"

"Your tires are spinning and you're stuck."

Santa Claus You Are Welcome.

Rude Snowpeople

A Snowman falls down drunk outside a bar.

"I love November - the crunch of leaves underfoot... the crisp air... the holiday markets..." "... it getting dark by mid-afternoon..." "Okay, that's less enjoyable."

"We're freaky February hares, the mad march ones have vanished due to global warming."

'YOU are fed up with it . . . How do you think I feel?'

I made snow angels in my good clothes and mom gave me the devil for it!

'That was quite a snow storm last night.'

'It's easy, just wee!'

"Frosty the Repairman"

"UK government aren’t budging boss. Sole supplier or not under the new procurement regulations our new contract has to have three KPIs..."

'I don't get it. They told me to serve merlot at room temperature.'

'It's a snow mobile.'

"Everytime you touch me, I get frostbite!"

"If you want to play fetch with the dog, throw your own @#&% arm."

Pre-Winter Ennui-'Hon, did you have the furnace checked?'

"I love this time of year."

Snooze Alarm for Mole.

Weather today.

'I bought winter tyres and it didn't snow.'

"Santa's elves have to eat, you know."

Greco-polar wrestling

"Aw, geez. My nuts are frozen." "T-T-Tell me about it."

"You have ice water in your veins."

"Yes, it's snowing in my office. Corporate feels utilities, like heat, are a luxury."

Snowman about snowman fallen on ice: 'Obviously they would have had time to clear the ice.'

"I told you we came back too early...I'm freezing my tail feathers off!"