Winter Weather Humorist Gifts

'I'd take that with a pinch of salt if I thought the council could spare any.'

"If global warming is real, then why are winters so cold?"

"The rear gunner got me."

'Well you wanted an office with a window.'

"All natural snow cones for sale."

'There's old Jim off to the shops. Slowed down a lot these days, ain't he.'

Captain steering house through flood.

"Your tires are spinning and you're stuck."

Rude Snowpeople

A Snowman falls down drunk outside a bar.

Just because I'm adapted to the cold, doesn't mean I like it!

'YOU are fed up with it . . . How do you think I feel?'

I made snow angels in my good clothes and mom gave me the devil for it!

'That was quite a snow storm last night.'

'It's easy, just wee!'

"I love this time of year."

"Everytime you touch me, I get frostbite!"

'I don't get it. They told me to serve merlot at room temperature.'

Weather today.

'I bought winter tyres and it didn't snow.'

"Oh no, Doris. . . not implants!"

"Aw, geez. My nuts are frozen." "T-T-Tell me about it."

Greco-polar wrestling

"Yes, it's snowing in my office. Corporate feels utilities, like heat, are a luxury."

Snowman about snowman fallen on ice: 'Obviously they would have had time to clear the ice.'

"I told you we came back too early...I'm freezing my tail feathers off!"

'I see a lot of that at this time of year...you've got a nasty case of cabin fever!'

"This heat transfer dance had better work. I'm freezing my tail off!"

"Still getting those hot flashes, Margaret?"

"Normally, applying heat would be the correct therapy, however..."

'Where is the global warming when you want it?'

Frosty decides to have a carrot job

'Van Helsing, I've told you that just Holy Water isn't enough to kill count Snowcula! You need HOT Holy Water!'

It's a bit derivative.