Wine Critic Gifts

"It tastes and smells just like a glass of wine!"

'Don't tell me, I know this one. Is it wine?'

"I detect a subtle bouquet of money."

'I've tried it - it's a 94.3829366, at best.'

"Drinking? Who's drinking? I'm antioxidizing."

Wine taster getting drunk

"Robust, full-bodied bouquet with just a hint of bitter, mean-spirited despair."

"Any advance on 'cat wazz'?

'Close enough, the one on your right is the red. Congratulation! You're our new wine critic.'

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

'Could I just get one that's wine flavored?'

Wine tasting

Red Wine

"That's between me and my vintner."

'Grisly? That's being a bit harsh, Paul, though I do admit it's a bit rough around the edges.'

'Wine's supposed to be flat, sir.'

Red Wine, White Wine and The One In The Middle.

'Hmmm...the aroma of tennis balls? Hard court, or clay?'

"Listen up, everybody—Charles is going to fill us in about the Grenache grape."

'Really, Bob, the Wine Fairy?'

The Other Wine Connoisseurs Were Beginning to Question Pete's Credentials.

"Waiter, this wine is corked!"

Wine conniosseurs in hell.

"Quick swig first?"

The Connoisseur.

I'm getting an ample full taste... I'm getting whimsical... I'm getting 'red'

The Wine Buff

"If I'd wanted to taste strawberries and summer fruits I'd have asked for fruit squash."

"Oh My God - surely the finest varietal themed stemware I've ever tasted from."

Chateau Générique.

Don Quixote

'Are you sure this wine is ten years old?' - 'Yes, I remember opening it ten years ago.'

'Enjoy?...How?'

'Okay, you've got a mouthful of minerals, grapefruit, herbs and grass. Is it starting to taste like a sauvignon blanc?'

'White zinfandel? I said I wanted a bottle of wine for my birthday.'