Whiskey Distiller Gifts

'It's a shame that valuable water gets wasted to wash cars or to take showers. It should be used responsible and for useful purposes only - for example to make whiskey.'

A Good Batch.

"Think of it as twenty one in human years. I'll take a bourbon and toilet water."

"OK. . .stain, aspirin, water tablet, B12 vitamin, and whisky."

Join me in a Martini?

"I'm afraid our drinking water isn't pure."

Trump Poutine

Bernstein's got himself a driverless club

"Jack Daniels-in-a-box"

God taking iceburgs with ice tongs for his whisky.

"Grapes, Rye, Malt... I got into this through my vegetarianism."

CASA DE JOY PREMIUM TEQUILA STONE BISSETT DISTILLERY CONT. NET.1000 ML 40% ALC Vol.

'I'm sorry, we don't serve spirits.'

"I believe you'll like our company. We pay our employees time and a fifth."

Bottle Distillery

"A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single malt."

'Not only was the superbug immune to antibiotics, but it had developed a taste for Dr Jones' whisky.'

Whiskey wars

"I may be an aged whiskey, but inside I still feel like a fresh ear of corn!"

"Whiskey...Leave the bottle."

Milton wonders if it would be possible to substitute scotch and sex for tea and sympathy.

'Whiskey and splash, sir.'

Which Hogwarts house are you?

"We'd like to do a song that will barely penetrate your consciousness as you continue to enjoy those faddish cigars and single-malt scotches."

"It says it's the vodka that's distilled twenty-nine times - they just can't seem to get it right."

Blue Blazer Cocktail.

"Is that neat whisky?"

'If you don't start feeling better in 24 hours, pour yourself a tall scotch.'

Gentleman's Club Scene

'Says here, a disgruntled employee brought a gun into the liquor distillery today...to the gills!'

The Angel's Share

'We have developed an APP we use to import ingredients from the Internet, merge them in the computer, and then download them into the distiller and then just bottle the output.'

Scotch and soda on a drip.

"If the energy drink isn't working, try scotch."