Whimsical Researcher Gifts

"Sure, we need more research in alchemy, necromancy, and sorcery, but where is the money going to come from?"

"Belly Button Research Council"

The Artist

Swan Fairy Tales

Lactose Intolerant

'Since I'm new here, let's start by clearning the air. You may have noticed that I'm short for a C.E.O. . .'

'Are you made of sugar?'

'Tastes like cherry kool-aid, what's it do?'

Dogs and their thoughts

'You forgot to pay the gravity bill, didn't you?'

Man retrives a mermaid from his swimming trunks after a swim in the sea

"Snow White! It's the dancing, singing woodland creatures wondering if you want to go down the pub."

'Fetching is a good thing...but there can be TOO MUCH of a good thing.'

"His exercise wheel has lost all its fascination sinces he started reading Hemingway."

'They make remarkably clean pets.'

Giant using sheep as cotton buds

"You'll have to help out here more. I pulled a hammy jumping over the moon."

Selfie Stick

"Hawaiian hitchhiker."

A man deflates and dissolves into the ground and becomes a flower.

"Scuba cow"

Spring Training

"... And this one needs a shot of vodka."

'He takes his doodling very seriously.'

"Why is there so much emphasis put on our stupid race?" "I think people are more interested in it as a metaphor than as an actual race." "Slow and steady wins the race, that sort of thing." "That would explain why I always lose..." "Bartender, another please." "Maybe you should slow down." "You never learn do you?"

A bear is sat on an armchair with old man slippers.

"Right here's fine."

"Yes, one is a dog."

The Shed Mystery: 'Ah! There you are! Ok, that's enough...time to go ho...uh...wait...what the...?'

''Raining cats and dogs' is just a phrase, Alix.'

Gondolier skimming up leaves in pool.

"You're calling it love, but it's really just static electricity."

"It was a cheese and wine party but the mice got there first!"

"I'm trying to forget a pussycat."

"Mainstream? Who's to say what's mainstream?"