Wedding Preparations Gifts

You're getting married this year. The planning is driving me crazy. You're displacing. Every bride does it. You're channeling your anxiety and fear about getting married into focusing on things like the dinner seating chart. I forgot about the seating chart. Happy to help.

The Happiest Hen in Acle

Lesbian civil partnership.

"Do you, Darlene, take Jim to be your lawfully wedded husband, when you could, clearly, do far better?"

"We stumbled onto a house - and both of us being young and in love and quick to grasp the situation - "

"You may now kiss the bride..."

"Stepping on the gown never works. They run faster without it."

I must say a winter wedding certainly saves on confetti!'

'Do you think it might be possible that what you wear could be a contributing factor to your relationship problems?'

'Oh my God. I love it!'

'Now I kinda wish we had planned a bigger wedding.'

'Do you promise to love, honor and remain co-dependent until death do you part?'

"Thanks to my wedding planner, everyone in the wedding is still talking to each other."

"Will you stand by him through humiliating revelation after humiliating revelation, and then-once you're sure it couldn't possibly get any worse-when even more humiliating revelations come to light?"

"And do you, Deborah Tannen, think they know what they're talking about?"

'Yes, I do have some ideas for the wedding! We could fly in on jet packs, say our vows on a bridge over a piranha pool with you in a white bikini, hold the reception in a casino and honeymoon in a secret underground bunker!'

"Look! I'm going to be a customer!"

"She can walk the walk, but can she talk the talk?"

Wedding Day Itinerary.

'Okay.. what the hell.'

"It started with a mutual interest in martial arts and developed into an interest in marital arts."

"And now, Marla and Dave will text their own vows."

" ... and peace be with you, although not likely."

"The wedding cake as holy sacrament"

Try Mediation

Boat wedding.

"As this is a civil ceremony, I'd rather you took the vows without swearing."

The Canine's version of cans tied to the back of a wedding car driving off with Cats attached

'It was an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers.'

"Who told the quartet to play 'Highway to Hell'?"

"...until death do you a favor."

',,, and if anyone knows of a reason why these two should not be married, let them storm this castle with pitchforks and torches or forever hold their peace,'

'I always cry at weddings!'

'Apparently the stag party has gone into extra time.'

'He does.'