Wannabe Warrior Gifts

Grocer with pretensions of being a soldier

"Well if I can't be a cowboy I'll be a lawyer for cowboys."

The Ferocious Viking Wiener Dog

'Do you think he's ready for the big round-up?'

New Guy.

'Hey, 'Houdini', after you figure out how to levitate the cork ou tof the bottle, I can use your magic at the kitchen sink.'

As Seen On TV

Wendel enjoyed magic school but he was having a little trouble in his trickonometry class.

My First Boat

"Ohhh... He's out all right!"

"I am a ninja rabbit. I am stealth personified. I am one of the unseen. I am now invisible...Darn."

Everyone in Tinseltown deserves 15 minutes of obscurity.

"There comes a time, Little Buddy, when you have to just accept that you'll never be famous....that your life will never be adapted for television and that when you die, only five or six people will truly care."

"I think we're ready for the big move up from shed band to full garage band."

'They can also be used to keep an eye on the traffic around you.'

'Be reasonable, son - even Santa couldn't get a horse into a box THAT size!'

Dave's new nail gun revived the childhood ambitions he'd had before realizing that he could earn more as a carpenter than as a hero.

"I'm going to demonstrate how dogs are stealth ninjas in the dark. See how I move silently....."

Trying to thumb his nose at authority, Lumpy stuck his thumb in his eye! Man covering eye with his hand.

Driving School Car being Followed by Wreckers.

'Son, as I can see it, your career prospects as a pirate seem to be... hm...limited!'

'OK, that's strike two. What is your third wish?'

"We'll stop for a bread, water and toilet break at 11.30... on Tuesday."

'Toupee !!'

The Island

"When you can sneak up on me, without my knowledge, then, and only then, can you consider yourself a true Ninja!"

'But look, Sire -- a whole lot of people have you down as their fifth choice!'