Wannabe Cowboy Gifts

"Well if I can't be a cowboy I'll be a lawyer for cowboys."

New Guy.

"Face it, Earl, ee're dogfoodboys."

'Be reasonable, son - even Santa couldn't get a horse into a box THAT size!'

Dave's new nail gun revived the childhood ambitions he'd had before realizing that he could earn more as a carpenter than as a hero.

The Runaway Horse

'Do you think he's ready for the big round-up?'

After the gun ban, the guys still liked to go out and horse around on weekends.

Zorro as a child.

Cow duel.

"Next, I'd like to play 'Guantanamera.'"

'Now, you can SWASH, and you can BUCKLE, but you can't SWASHBUCKLE.'

Runs-With-Scissors Boy - Part One

All Les's dreams of stardom were coming true, and he'd only played one note.

"You ever get the feeling the posse's starting to lose focus?"

'I could have been the next Neil Young, but my ol' man made me take singing lessons.'

'I think winning that last hand went to Bob's head, because he now has an entourage.'

Davey Crockets Teddy Bear hat

As Seen On TV

The modern sheriff.

"This time it's curtains for you, Black Bart!"

'I don't see how you can put your profession as TV star just because you were in the crowd of Match of the Day!'

Grocer with pretensions of being a soldier

'You're going to have to stay confined to the bunkhouse for a week.'

'It's not just that he plays games all the time, it's the games he plays. He's not playing 'Guitar Hero,' he's playing 'Guitar Sidekick''.

'Hey you take that outside.'

How to win Genius Grants for Dummies!

Bunfight at the O.K. Corral

Bear watching a man trying to fish bear style.

The Don't-Quit-Your-Day-Job Comedic Revue

Musician sings off key while his dog can only watch,his jaws strapped together

"There comes a time, Little Buddy, when you have to just accept that you'll never be famous....that your life will never be adapted for television and that when you die, only five or six people will truly care."

Everyone in Tinseltown deserves 15 minutes of obscurity.

"I think we're ready for the big move up from shed band to full garage band."

"I found my thrill on Blueberry Hill."