Waiver Warriors Gifts

"The Chef's Special is to die for. If you order it, you'll need to sign a waiver."

'Not that net!'

"Hey, the neighbors just installed a new wifi router."

"It's true: no more burpees."

Zumbie: Zumba for zombies.

"Can I still do my pilates?"

"I have to get down to 125 pounds before I go back to my real gym."

Tell me about it--last night I ate a whole sleeve of Communion wafers.

The Ladies of Kew encouraged everybody to recycle.

'Are you picky about preferring something with a livable wage?'

National Living Wage from April 1st.

"That's you nomad's answer to everything...ROAD TRIP!"

'A word in my office Jones.'

Advanced aerobicizers wait till after class to aid the fallen.

"Why settle for itsy-bitsy when you could be swole as hell?"

"Hell: The Airport"

" ... and if we finish pillaging early enough, we can still catch the evening Zumba class on the after deck."

There's a popular new health spa down there. The endorphins are having a blast in aerobics. Antibodies are learning kickboxing and the adrenaline is getting some much needed relaxation in the yoga studio. The only problem is the water molecules. Everybody is concerned about them! What's wrong? They haven't been seen since they went into the sauna!

'Life isn't fair! Most of the stuff I worried about over the years never even happened!'

"Take it easy, honey. Beneath that terrifying rage is our twelve-year-old daughter. My GOD, when will the wi-fi go back on?!!"

Clancy Strip:At a Restaurant

'Keep fit.'

'We took a look at our passport pictures and realized that we need a vacation.'

"It used to be that if you worried about unseen forces you were considered paranoid. Now you're a security expert."

'That's our group plan.'

'C'Mon ladies, work that bovine!'

Gas Bill

"To retain our staus as an equal opportunities employer...."

"That's not the motivational reward I had in mind."

'Do you have a flight that will get us to Gate 2?'

Muscular Santa

Arrivals, Purgatory, Departures.

"Smacked down by reality in 24 seconds."

"... But, Derek. The travel agent told us not to drink the water!"

Aerobics Class. Trainer. What is your body telling you? We're not on speaking terms right now.