Wage Critic Pillows

"We will create 12,000 new jobs...but we only need 4,000 new employees because on these salaries they'll need three jobs each to make a living!"

"You knew this was a soul-sucking job when you took it."

'Here, we don't need a retirement plan. If you do your job as we want it, you'll directly go from your desk to hell.'

'We're looking for someone who is willing to just do their job.'

"I like your thinking Steve. Hiding the contract loopholes under the staples is brilliant."

'Our new simplified energy bills just have a few options starting with 'Grossly inflated' and progressing to the premium 'Bloodsucker' package. . .'

'Mr Clayton will see you first, Sir.'

'Just because I'm Overpaid doesn't mean You're Underpaid.'

"Brodkin, now that the economy is creating jobs at a faster than expected clip, why don't you go out and find yourself one?"

'For those of you who don't wish to know the results of our executives pay...turn away now.'

BP Greed Credentials - huge profits and cuts to environmental promises.

"Perfect! Since our company's motto is 'transparency,' make the contract's fine print light gray against white."

"You misread the terms of your employment. Your probation period is 6 years, not 6 months."

"That's not a company progress chart. That's the bosses salary!"

'I'm looking for a workaholic who feels the great job he does is compensation enough.'

"Remember unpaid interns are a renewable resource."

The struggle for a decent payment.

'There are some subjects that are off limits...CEO bonuses...Overtime pay...Business ethics...'

"And despite recent insinuations, this loan contract being signed by my client is perfectly legitimate."

'The problem is, you don't take enough pride in your temporary, no benefit, below living wage job!'

Moanathon.

"There are 45,000 people at the stadium but only 500 of them bought tickets...the other ones are security guards for our 250 million euro player!"

"No this is your contract. The other one's your bill

'I reject the terms of the contract!'

'We really can't afford golden parachutes any more, but here's a plastic crash helmet.'

Lawyer to lady: 'Since I specialize in eye injuries, I've eliminated all the fine print.'

'And best of all - no hidden clauses!'

"As long as you insist that we hire executives smarter than you, how about we get ones that smell better, too?"

"No, no. The contract I signed was of the non-binding kind."

"Of course under the new contract 24 hour cover will be optional, you could also opt to do 36 or 48 hours a day!"

"Any other skills besides having the ability to look busy?"

"Classic ballcap $79.95. White, black, red or blue. Adjustable. One size fits all."