Vision Care Enthusiast Pillows

George Washington's Birthday

"I AM AN OPHTHALMOLOGIST."

'Read the top line out loud. I need to check my lottery numbers.'

Opticians.

'The problem with living in water is I can never tell when my contact lens is in!'

Dr. Harper had a special eye exam chart made for hieroglyphics professor patient.

'Transylvania's most famous Optometrist 'Count Mracula'.'

"I've had these glasses since I was a kid, when my doctor told me I'd grow into them..."

Hospital Departments

"Do you feel your eyes have changed any since your last visit?" "No. They seem to be ho, ho, ho, holding their own."

'I'm sorry, Madam Zola. I'm afraid you no longer have second sight.'

'The other kids at school say I might need glasses, Dad.'

Musical Eye Test

'Now watch our sales increase.'

'No cheating'

'You have to do something...My husband just doesn't look at me the way he used to.'

"Ralph - you'd play better golf if you had your eyes checked."

'Inadvertently, Optometrist Niles Frobe triggers the Global Financial crisis' 'You have a bad case of eyestrain. I want you to keep your eyes off the ball for a few weeks!'

A question you don't want - "How many fingers am I holding up."

'Throw them back They're not what nine out of ten eye doctor's recommend for dry eyes when stranded on a desert island.'

'Inadvertently, Optometrist Niles Frobe triggers the Global Financial crisis' 'You have a bad case of eyestrain. I want you to keep your eyes off the ball for a few weeks!'

'I'm thinking about laser eye surgery.'

'You have a 9:00 A.M. appointment with your ophthalmologist to check your vision and a 11:00 A.M. appointment with the staff to rally the troops around your vision.'

'You're right, Mom. Carrots did give me good eyesight. Now I can spot vegetables I don't like a mile away.'

'You've haed the eye exam. Now buy the t-shirt!'

'Transylvania's most famous Optometrist 'Count Macula'.

Optician: 'I can't seem to switch off.'

"Oh, come on ref. How can you not see that?!"

I believe there is something wrong with Tommy: He has perfect eyesight...

'Guess who I bumped into today? EVERYBODY!'

'Unknown fact: Cows aren't grazing...they're searching for their contact lenses.'

"Eye irritation is quite common when Saturn and Jupiter are in this position. It's called conjunctivitis."

"He did well with his eye exam but was disappointed to find out that laser surgery won't help out his score when he plays laser tag."

'The smallest line I can read says 'Made In China'.'

Same Day Glasses - "They'll be ready in a month. It's not my fault you couldn't read the fine print."