Vision Care Buff Pillows

'No you can't take a copy home to prepare for your eye exam next week'

Don't swallow. I've lost a contact.

'Transylvania's most famous Optometrist 'Count Mracula'.'

"Do you feel your eyes have changed any since your last visit?" "No. They seem to be ho, ho, ho, holding their own."

Hospital Departments

'The other kids at school say I might need glasses, Dad.'

Musical Eye Test

'No cheating'

A question you don't want - "How many fingers am I holding up."

'I'm thinking about laser eye surgery.'

'Everyone keeps telling me I need my eyes checked, so here I am!'

"Ralph - you'd play better golf if you had your eyes checked."

National Optometrists Association. O.K., whose idea was it to form a focus group?…

'You have a 9:00 A.M. appointment with your ophthalmologist to check your vision and a 11:00 A.M. appointment with the staff to rally the troops around your vision.'

'I can't wait for a generic version of eyes of newts to come out.'

Optician: 'I can't seem to switch off.'

"Oh, come on ref. How can you not see that?!"

'Unknown fact: Cows aren't grazing...they're searching for their contact lenses.'

"I'm here because my vision is getting so bad I can't even see clearly in my dreams at night!"

"You have superior extra ocular muscle strength - how often do you roll your eyes at your husband?"

'There's no cure, but the good news is we have some great support groups!'

'No,if you'll read the eyes-in-the-back-off-your-head chart, I check your mom vision,'

'Very good, but not quite 'presidential vision'.'

Groucho Glasses Eye Test

"Feels like an elephant trunk...."

"Am I seeing double? You and your twin are the experts, why don't you two tell me!"

George Washington's Birthday

'Cliff! Cliff!.. Where are you Cliff?'

Hen to optometrist about chicks: 'I'm here to check my peepers.'

'Make sure they fit straight!'

Header: Franchising of Optometry Caption: 'With every new pair of glasses you get a cheap plastic toy of a character from the latest kids movie'

'It quickly became apparent that Optometry was not the right career choice for Errol'. 'Is that the right one? I can't tell!'

"I'm here for an examination, my ditzy missus thinks I may need glasses."

"I think an IQ test would be more appropriate at this time."

A footballer is having an eye test.