Vino Adventurer Gifts

"Would monsieur prefer a nice unassuming red or the bad boy of the cellar?"

'So much for your theory that mixing two 50-point-rated wines equals one rated 100.'

'There's over 500,000 different wines? Bernie, we've got work to do!'

"Is there any way I can un-drink this wine?"

"By the way, the failing grades you'll be seeing-they won't be virtual."

"Which wine would you pair with the complimentary bread and butter?"

'How do you folks get away with such flagrant violation of Prohibition?'

"In our house the four major food groups are Bordeaux, Merlot, Chardonnay and Champagne."

"Would you care to accessorize each other?"

"Karen's idea of wine reduction..."

"My wife commissioned a portrait of me."

'Okay, so you were right; maybe figuring 13 bottles of wine per person was a little too much.'

'Your switching to Scotch? And after I've given you the best beers of my life!'

A giant glass of red wine

'When we bought this place we thought we'd only be making wine. Apparently, we're also into spirits.'

'C'mon! Speed it up! I've got a bottle of wine here that says it's meant to be drunk soon!'

'It's a penny slot--give me a hundred.'

On Champagne: 'Nobody knows the bubbles I've seen.'

'Would you like some of our house wine? I just made it.'

'We outsource our grape juice, marketing, bottling and distribution, and yet he's supposed to give a speech tonight on winemaking - bosses,outsources,outbetter show him what a grape looks like.'

Red Wine

'I need to find a loose machine like that.'

"Now this is what I call an honest little pub!"

"I've tried that one; it's a blend of 74 different red grapes - including two of the plastic decorative type."

'Well,we had a good run.' - Worldwide Hops Shortage.

December 26 - Vegas, office (post) Christmas party.

'No, I can't remember the name of the wine, but it did come in a bottle about this tall, if that's any help.'

"I'd like a wine that was born in France and then bummed around California."

Wine connoisseur in search of new vintage.(Wine)

'I think we're all safe now. Go ahead and say spatlese.'

"Virtual Reality glasses. Well, I said my sermon would let them see the real difference between Heaven and Hell this morning"

"This family-owned boutique wine is produced from a single grape."

'Just as I suspected, guys - looks like we'be got ourselves an undercover wine drinker.'

'Hey, Dad! How about a round of computer golf?'