Veterinary Science Buff Gifts

'I think I'm going deaf - I can't hear the horse whisperer.'

'Hi, Doc! I don't think I'm going to need you after all....'

Lactose Intolerant

'Cat or dog?' - 'A little of both.'

"Blow out the candles!" "Make a wish!" "I wish I had my testicles back."

Young Dr. Dolittle.

"I offer emotional support and companionship for those with PTSD." "I detect cancer and other human diseases by scent detection." "I squeak-fart when startled."

'...and now, Gentlemen, we come to our final lecture in advanced cardiology...'

Goat about goat: 'He's no longer gruff since he's been on Prozac.'

"Hello, Pine Grove Elementary? Could you tell Miss Pritchard to come to Lakeview Veterinarian Clinic right away?"

"Hm, still sky high. Let's try the other arm."

"We're going to the Vet aren't we."

"A CAT scan? Are you sure?"

'He's our new Bone Specialist!'

"Fill it up!"

'The results of your physical exam are fine, except for your reflexes: They're more 'dog-like' than 'cat-like'.'

'This model is hard to get parts for.'

'The vet said that getting spayed might hurt a little. But having nine puppies hurt a little, too.'

"I'm concerned. You seem to have catlike reflexes."

"You say that using a colicky horse to pull you out of the mud may actually help his colic?"

'Must really be a terrible headache you've got there, Doctor.'

"I'm excited to get fixed at the vet, had no idea I was broken."

You've been sitting on molehills again, haven't you?

'If it doesn't itch, why worry?'

'No.... My cat doesn't like being given pills either...'

Separation

Curse my curiosity and four stomachs!

'Wait, Doc, wait! My cow's still in your chute!'

Examination.

'Don't worry, my baser instincts are in a surgical waste bin in Hoboken.'

'HEEL!...HEEL!'

'Eloise! Come back! I was just going to show you some of the equipment we use in veterinary school...'

'Being a brilliant,inspiring teacher is NOT adequate, Hackwell....'

Vet to owner about dog with bird at chest: 'I suspect heartworm.'

"Dr. Eliot, would you let the dog out?"