Veterinary Clinic Humor Gifts

'If you had asked me I could have TOLD you that he bites.'

"Blow out the candles!" "Make a wish!" "I wish I had my testicles back."

'There! Now he's tied to my satisfaction and ready for surgery!'

A classic case of 'Cow-Worm'.

Committee On Feline Healthcare

'Well, it's kind of an IV enema!'

'Sure you can have another opinion but I still say you are a fat pig.'

'Maybe we shouldn't have used the tail as the donor site for a skin graft.'

'Any other symptoms besides difficulty in marking your territory'

"Please note nurse: healthy baby, next appointment in two weeks..."

Of course you're feeling disgruntled. You've lost your voice.

'James Herriot would never say a thing like that!'

Oh, good - Looks like the doctor's in.

"Medical insurance? Are you kidding? No one will cover me for nine lives!"

Casey's Veterinarian Clinic and Taxidermy 'Either way you'll get your pet back.'

'...windpuffs in front and a capped hock on the right rear...'

'Don't worry, it's just the anaesthetic...'

'But hey, who am I to complain?'

Outingpatient

'I don't care if a person would have been treated the same way. This is not a person. This is MY DOG!"

'No I'm going to do this one standing.

'I'm pretty sure that you have something that is difficult to pronounce.'

'How the heck does one do CPR on a tortoise?'

'No, I'm sorry. I'm Doctor Ford and I do the large animal work....'

"I can't find anything wrong with you at all."

'With this flashlight technique we can save a lot of money on radiographs!'

"We were lucky to find that flamingo joint for your knee replacement."

'What's your husband's intolerance ?'

I have learned how to solve most of these Sharpei dermatological problems...

'Is there ANY good news, Doctor?' 'Well, you don't need to worry about scraping by on a pension.'

Fertility Clinic Notice - Watch For Children

'How long has it been since you gave up smoking?'

'Next we tried continuous intravenous drip fluid therapy...'

'There - it's down, now give her nine more of these daily.'