Veggie Negotiator Gifts

"I ate those two extra Brussels sprouts mom wanted us to share. You owe me big time!"

'What's intravenous feeding? My mom says if I don't eat my vegetables, she'd do that to me!'

"This is a green vegetable, Mom. You wouldn't want me to break a new year's resolution, would you?"

Life with a professional baseball catcher.

Queen of Quinoa

Better Not Squash.

Veggie Hall of Fame.

"You can't make me eat Brussel sprouts Mum: it's illegal to force-feed geese in this country!"

'Dad, you know that I'd never buy a pet that eats meat. Luckily, I found a guy who sold me the World's only vegetarian dog!'

'Because Thanksgiving is about a bountiful harvest. That's why we have to eat all these vegetables.'

Vegetarian Nightmare.

'Young lady, I'm afraid existential despair is no excuse for not eating your lima beans.'

"My mom is a vegetarian, so she doesn't bring home the bacon. She brings home kale and quinoa."

If we build raised beds and a compost bin now

TV's hot new political show: Meet the Produce. From the left, a giant carrot. From the right, big broccoli. Let's be frank. The Republicans have no fiscal discipline. And the tax-and-spend liberals do? We're not ballooning the deficit! Waging war to promote freedom is not free! You stupid rotten vegetable! You're low in vitamin E! Cut to commercial.

Taken genetic engineering too far

September: All the familiar signs of harvest are with us once more.

'The Ailing Matisse tries cutting out meat and dairy products.'

'They send you into the ketchup department? HA! I'M going into pizza!'

"Which one on table three has gone for the vegetarian option?"

"No animals were harmed during this performance!"

'No, you can't complain to the waiter about the vegetables floating in your soup. It's vegetable soup!'

'No, you can't turn your vegetables into bio-fuel.'

'Mom, your diet says you can eat all the vegetables you want. Wow! A diet without vegetables!'

'Look! I grew a carrot!'

'So, that's settled - the eyes have it!'

"I remember when we wouldn't buy the bent knobbly ones. Now we pay twice as much for them."

"Cheer up! There's a magic ingredient that makes it easy to eat vegetables...CHEESE SAUCE!"

'Not a shed, just a shop.'

'I'm in a lot of trouble, but it's worth it. There's not enough dirt left to grow spinach.'

"Do we HAVE to be omnivores?"

We've been working on them in the wind tunnel...

Dreams of Spring...

It's Darth Tater!

Why Shirley hates to eat genetic modified Broccoli.