Veggie Avenger Gifts

"Last time, eat your greens or your dad does the Trump Dance...."

Life with a professional baseball catcher.

'The vegetables sat in the crisper for hours...days...a whole week. Then suddenly, the drawer opened. A hand reached in, grabbed the kale, and all you could hear was the sound of...A Garbage disposal.'

Better Not Squash.

Veggie Hall of Fame.

Vegetarian Nightmare.

'Dad, you know that I'd never buy a pet that eats meat. Luckily, I found a guy who sold me the World's only vegetarian dog!'

'Because Thanksgiving is about a bountiful harvest. That's why we have to eat all these vegetables.'

"My mom is a vegetarian, so she doesn't bring home the bacon. She brings home kale and quinoa."

If we build raised beds and a compost bin now

Taken genetic engineering too far

September: All the familiar signs of harvest are with us once more.

'The Ailing Matisse tries cutting out meat and dairy products.'

'No, you can't complain to the waiter about the vegetables floating in your soup. It's vegetable soup!'

“Children hate me.”

"It's something I made myself - chocolate covered veggies."

'They send you into the ketchup department? HA! I'M going into pizza!'

"How did you cure your dog of begging for food?"

'No, you can't turn your vegetables into bio-fuel.'

'Mom, your diet says you can eat all the vegetables you want. Wow! A diet without vegetables!'

'For heaven's sake Armitage - can't you just accept 2nd place in the best leek category?'

'So, that's settled - the eyes have it!'

"I remember when we wouldn't buy the bent knobbly ones. Now we pay twice as much for them."

"You're lucky your garden failed. If I'd had to can it, it would've been your marriage."

"Eat those veggies or I'll change the wifi password."

'Look! I grew a carrot!'

The vegan hunter

'I'm sorry but I can't bring out the dessert menu until both of you have eaten your veggies, company policy.'

'No Jennifer! I never head of mad broccoli disease.'

'I'm in a lot of trouble, but it's worth it. There's not enough dirt left to grow spinach.'

'For heaven's sake, Armitage... Can't you just accept 2nd place in the best leek category??'

We've been working on them in the wind tunnel...

Dreams of Spring...

'When Mom said you should eat a lot of green stuff, I don't think she meant grasshoppers.'

"Do we HAVE to be omnivores?"