Vegetarian Warrior Gifts

'Alliance Against Red Meat'

I grew up vegetarian. Wow. That takes work to stay strong. What motivates you? Hey, lettuce brain! Peer pressure.

'... Got anything besides apples?'

'Hey, a fly! This is supposed to be vegetarian soup.'

"Apparently, giving up wearing fur wasn't enough!"

Queen of Quinoa

Give quiche a chance!

"Getting drunk grilling lettuce just isn't the same."

"I just found a lacto-vegan restaurant and Janet from accounts says she's FRUITAIAN!"

The mission: Impossible burger.

'No - we really don't cater for vegans, even our salad dressing is made from sperm oil!'

"I'm getting subtle hints of chlorophyll."

“Children hate me.”

"Race you to the corner! Last one there is an expired egg substitute!"

Dale regretted going to the Vegan restaurant.

Your life is in great danger...

'For heaven's sake Armitage - can't you just accept 2nd place in the best leek category?'

"You said we were going to break bread, Mom. These are vegetables."

"I am still vegan, I am just having a cheat day."

'The only vegan item on the menu is the menu itself.'

The vegan hunter

'No Jennifer! I never head of mad broccoli disease.'

'For heaven's sake, Armitage... Can't you just accept 2nd place in the best leek category??'

"After going vegan, replacing all the animal heads just made sense."

"You know, if lima beans, cauliflower and broccoli tasted like candy and ice cream, we wouldn't have to go through this every night!"

"Were you genuinely interested in where I get my protein, or was it the introductory question to a long and pointless attack on my personal dietary choices?"

The Last Dinner

'I'll try the 'Hippy meal'.'

Hell's Allotment Holders.

"What've you got that's good for vegans?"

Planet earth was again safe, Lenny a true hero and his brussel sprouts, for one, not wasted!!'

I'm a vegan triathlete

"Ey up, guys! Here comes the slaughter mower - everyone Duck!"

"I'm in the mood for meat."

"Is it safe to assume that the meat is laced with antibiotics and the salad is chockfull of pesticides?"