Vegan Warrior Gifts

I'm a vegan triathlete

"I'm sorry. But being a vegan doesn't give you a free pass."

"No, 'tofu' isn't short for 'toe fungus'!"

Dale regretted going to the Vegan restaurant.

"But you know I'm vegan."

"No thanks. Me Vegan!"

"Dirk is vegan."

"Don't worry I've been a vegan all my adult life, however. . ."

"I don't see your point. I'm vegan, I expect veggies, and if they don't cater to my wants they're getting zero stars."

"I am still vegan, I am just having a cheat day."

"We'll be using a pig's kidney in the transplant....Suit yourself, we'll try a turnip, good luck with that!"

Adopting a Plant based lifestyle

"Race you to the corner! Last one there is an expired egg substitute!"

"Don't worry, boy. You're my best friend, and I'm a vegan."

"A vegan and a jogger. Remember, living too long can kill you."

"Being a vegan should be considered an extreme sport."

"What've you got that's good for vegans?"

"Ey up, guys! Here comes the slaughter mower - everyone Duck!"

"We're having chicken Cuca for dinner tonight!"

"Getting drunk grilling lettuce just isn't the same."

"I just found a lacto-vegan restaurant and Janet from accounts says she's FRUITAIAN!"

"Sorry Matilda, but we're going to have to let you go...on the bright side, I hear they're hiring over at Chik-Fi

"Were you genuinely interested in where I get my protein, or was it the introductory question to a long and pointless attack on my personal dietary choices?"

"Do you have a vegetarian option?"

'Yes, nine injured - but it could've been so much worse.'

Tofurkey.

'No - we really don't cater for vegans, even our salad dressing is made from sperm oil!'

No animals were harmed in the making of this leather whip.

'The only vegan item on the menu is the menu itself.'

'Still it can't be any worse than last year, I never thought we'd have to suffer a 'traditional lacto-vegan' Christmas dinner.'

"After going vegan, replacing all the animal heads just made sense."

'I'll try the 'Hippy meal'.'

The Last Dinner

Alice's Vegan Caf

What do you think monkey would say if he could talk? That's easy. He's discuss how ratty this couch is. It has millions of infectious microbes that will give us a cold, flu or worse. He'd talk about November - An historic election at a precarious time in our nation's history. Who knows. Indeed. Want to get dinner? Perhaps a vegan feast? Something organic without carcinogens. At least we can agree on that. Don't breathe on me.