Vaudeville Aficionado Gifts

Walter The Sea Monster

The Moe Howard Installation

"We're changing the name from 'The Aristocrats' to 'The Republicans'."

Ventriloquist with faeces on his hands.

"We call ourselves the 3 Geniuses. Unfortunately, we never quite caught on."

Adult Courses. It's so hard keeping the information from different classes separate! I'm talking film history and psychology. I failed a test because I said a "psychopath" is the walkway Norman Bates took home. I also confused geography and aeronautics. I said the "great plains" are located at an Air Force testing base in the California desert. My worst nightmare was confusing the thinks ti learned in driver's education and statistics. But at least I now know it's driving where you must st

"I'll do the movie but I want to be highly compensated and highly acclaimed."

"Hey grandpa, tell us more about the time you were in that Steven Spielberg movie."

'Hello? Missing Persons?'

"Seth, here, is one of the best young creative compromisers in the business."

"Bloody hell!"

Kritik's Korner

"And now, for your entertainment, I will drink a glass of water while Rempert, here, remains eerily silent."

Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup? A scene from an Esther Williams movie.

Sign in book shop window: 'Critics agree the book is much better than the movie.'

The Selfie

Canadian film production

"We need to make it through at least one movie, so we have something to root for during the Oscars."

Moby Dick

'Action!...Cut!...Right, everything else is CGI'

"You can tell it's a period drama because they're not wearing ozone helmets."

Movies vs. Films

Arnold's first day on the job - 'What do you mean...no director!!!...and who is going to tell me what to do?'

'So no animals were harmed in that movie...but how about the audience?!'

'And I love the part when he finds out that it was his brother all along!'

Film Star Robert de Niro

Script/Director/Producer/Decency Panel.

Silvio Berlusconi - The emperors new clothes.

"No need for stage fright, it's just a documentary crew: be yourself..."

Jim Carrey,

'Nine national treasures in one film! Start writing your Oscar speech, darling.'

Hollywood Breakup

Moon

Hoxton map.

'Well of course there are no snakes, have you not heard of St Patrick, at all, at all?'