Valiant Quester Gifts

Dragon Head Trophy

"An un-observed universe ceases to exist. Yeah right!"

Homo Gamus

Alice in Wonderland: The Queen Turns into a Pack of Cards.

Gamers

Wouldn't it be cool if we could live in the Middle Ages, Randy? We could roam the countryside on horses and carry swords. We could hang out in taverns and drink ale, maybe earn enough coin to hire a hero … Then we could go on a quest. Maybe slay some golems. I think it's a real sign of intellectual maturity that we haven't even mentioned maidens yet. Real Middle-Ages maidens would eat you for breakfast.

'Actually, there's no interview necessary. Just pull out the sword and the job's yours.'

A Knight Arrives at a Boiling Lake Filled with Monsters (Don Quixote).

"Quantum Physics"? How am I going to learn all of this stuff? A bit at a time?

"Scientists confirmed today that everything we know about the structure of the universe is wrongedy-wrong-wrong."

"All right, pal, I'm just saying, that's what I'd do if it was my Large Hadron Collider."

"We'll settle this the old-fashioned way - with a dance-off."

'I was working on developing anti-matter under laboratory conditions, but I couldn't find anything to keep it in.'

"It's an interdimensional portal that can facilitate travel across both space and time... but we mostly use it for storage."

"Why do I hate religion? Imagine if half the money ever donated to religion had instead been used for scientific research. That's the world religion stole from me! Instead of worrying about the coronavirus, I could be slaying orcs on a starship's holodeck!"

'My God Pearson you're right. All these years the greates scientific minds have been looking for the theory of everything and all we had to do was Google it!'

"We seem to be at that point where particle physics leaves of and theology begins."

"May I borrow your glasses so I can find my glasses?"

Time Travel Research Lab

Toastquest!

'Fortunes, Impressions, Hunches, Wild Guesses'

'To become ONE with the Universe, you must first become COMPLIANT with the Universe!'

'I had laser eye surgery and I still can't find the remote.'

'Scientists claim they have found the 'God Particle'. In a related story, they are still looking for the 'Job Creator Particle'.'

Two men in war bonnets sit in front of a giant skull

'So, there really is a Higgs Boson?'

"Dark energy's hard to detect because it's made from happiness."

'Newton's fourth law - physicists congregate periodically in obscure European cities to have their picture taken, and then they quickly disperse.

'He's close -- he's developed a unified field theory for everything except anchovies.'

"Hello! - Have you ever thought about changing your energy supplier..?"

Higgs Boson particles at a training session: "Geneva is a no-fly zone."

Think I'll be a more effective alpha male if I learn to play pool? That's on of those things you always see an alpha male do: stand around a pool hall polishing his stick and racking up the balls.

'I became a theoretical physicist because my poor hand-eye coordination precluded me from doing experiments...'

'This?! This is the legendary fountain of youth that men have sought for centuries.'

"How would I know what 'the meaning of life' is...? I was hoping you were mountain rescue!"