Underwater Themes T-Shirts

Sorry, Jack, the new 'Health and Safety Officer' is very strict!

"At least the virus didn't get him."

'Cannonball!'

Sailor in Car.

Emergency Phone.

"Just one more thump. . . just one more thump."

On the brink.

'Maybe it should be funnier...'

'Let go of that balloon right now!'

Dolphins playing on a seesaw.

'This is Onstar, how may I help you?'

Chicken soup for the sole.

'You look gorgeous, honey! I love it when you wear your tentacles 'up'.'

"This is a great school but it wasn't my first choice."

'Excuse me - are you organic?'

Captain Corcoran, Commander of H.M.S. Pinafore

Cat scratches on a pirate's wooden leg.

'It's the pink spot, Jim lad - them rascals is going to try and tweak my nipples!'

"Shred the plank."

Captain Hook getting his hook stuck in the rail, again

Subwoofer

'I can't find a dry martini anywhere.'

"As night falls, You return to claim what isn't yours. . . come at me, sea devil!!!"

Bob liked a challenge, and the shipwreck gave him something to get his teeth into.

'No Jake, I don't want to watch you do it again.'

Pirate captain: 'I'm so embarrassed! I walked around all day with my swash unbuckled!'

Making fun of Starfish.

'Oil painting is fine, but I can't do watercolours, obviously...'

"You'll have to excuse my date. He spontaneously combusts from time to time."

"But honey. . . he's just not our kind!"

"I want out, Laura."

"Don't trust his tail—I know a scallywag when I see one."

'He runs this firm like a ship.'

Celebrity anagrams: Is a salt water rat (Answer: Alastair Stewart)

'I think he wants you to play ball!'