Tyrant Tales Pillows

"Your idea of ankle monitors for the entire kingdom is not polling well, sire!"

'What clan do you belong to?'

Struggling with issues from his own childhood, the Bedroom Bandit would sneak in and jumble children's room across the nation. Not a mother believed it.

Scottish party

Out of kilter.

Woman has 3 towels in her restroom: 'Mine', 'Mine' and 'Mine'.

'You must be awfully secure in your masculinity.'

"Not tonight, Jon. I have to clean for the cleaning lady."

Highland Piper.

Scotsman in the bath...

'At least they did a good job on him.'

'Apart from his awful workmanship, my hubby's handy work is fine.'

I don't trust banks. I keep some of my money right here. It's prudent to have a financial cushion.

The Scottish Lawn

"No screen time means more scream time."

'You'll have more luck getting the sword out of the stone than getting the remote control out of his hand.'

Where Scottish milk comes from.

Executive fitness.

Woman pulling tartan trolley and a Scotsman pulling bagpipes.

Scottish Love

"Rudy, if you're playing a video game in there. I'm breaking this door down. Some of us have got to go."

'I'm about to have a tantrum. What are you doing?'

"I have nothing to hide."

"Hold on a tick! I didn't consent to this. . . Did you consent to this?"

'Don't change the channel.'

"Then they revoked his hunting license!"

Woman sees towels with 'Mine' on all of them

"My solicitor tells me I have grounds for a divorce. You're a control freak."

"You're sitting in my place!"

''Proclaim freedom throughout the land'? - You're kidding, right?'

Pete had found his home planet.

Scottish Birthday

Tannery.

A repairman has a small box marked 'Useful Screws' next to a huge box of 'Useless Screws.'

'My first one is obvious making it illegal to ever question me...In that case, it'll be the right for everyone to never question me! Good catch, daddy. Thanks...'