Twin Birth Gifts

'Please tell me you're baby sitting?'

"No, there was no 'Buy One, Get One Free.' You're twins."

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- he's kind of a starter kit.'

"He's my smart-aleck twin."

'Those are my triplets. Com, Net and Org Barnes.'

"I'm exempt from the company fitness program. I have triplets at home."

"Remember, she had twins, so I go in first, and then you follow about 3 minutes later."

"I think it's time we learned to stand up for our selves."

Mother pushes twins on a double-decker swing.

Maternity ward: 'Oh boy - stereo!'

'What's the plural of baby?'

man juggling career, home and children

"Honestly, all three of them were mistakes."

'Your wife has had triplets. I suggest you go home and get some of the sleep you won't get in the next several years.'

'Actually both my kids are twins...'

"Triple whammy."

'Twiiiiiiiiins!!!!'

His real name is Jasper Underwood Farthington III...but we just call him 'Stinky'.

Reflected Glory

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- she's kind of a starter kit.'

'The worst part is not to give birth, but to remember all their names!'

'Gee, Dad, Mom's getting better at this all the time!'

Twins

'A boy? Come on, Mom, you can do better than that!'

'Oh, boy - stereo!'

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- it's hard to believe we're related.'

Twins

'I don't believe it - At school all my teachers said I was an underachiever!'

The Houseplants vs The Kids

'Actually the twins are not hard to tell apart. When I put them down, the one that cries is Dennis.'

"Twins!...Who's the other father?"

Twin brothers playing Monopoly, one is winning, one losing

"Early Father's Day Gift!"

"Have you ever heard the saying, 'Two heads are better than one'?"