Tweet Master Pillows

"You've got bird flu, but it's tweetable."

"Contestants, you have thirty seconds, two hundred and eighty characters, and an unfamiliar topic - can you find a way to make it all about you?"

"You're allowed to post one tweet..."

"The tweet you posted last night struck a chord around the world, united all factions, and basically altered the course of humanity."

"Remember, Dance-With-Buffalo, only up to 140 clouds."

"What have you tweeted this time?"

'…and remember - around HERE, ‘talk is CHEEP'.'

"Twitter is back! Hurry, hurry, get yer free speech here!"

'Sir, your tweeting coach is here.'

'The doctors say I have a rare illness that turns people into birds - it's untweetable.'

'We're looking for something that captures the zeitgeist of the nation...you know, the Great American Tweet.'

"My Twitter account isn't too interesting. It's mostly just a bunch of threats."

Ornithologist

'It's a tweet from Maid Marian.'

"He just sits there, trying to think of the tweet to end all tweets."

"Jeremy and I are so in sync, we finish each other's tweets."

"I have the new list of approved tweets."

'My son is studying communications in college. He never writes, calls, texts, or emails his parents.'

"When I Say Tweet, You Say Tweet!"

"If you think you've earned this by consistently retweeting my tweets -- you're right."

"You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can be taken out of context and put on Twitter and then it'll be a whole thing."

"I haven't been in any academic journals but I do get my Tweets re-Tweeted a lot."

"I tweeted yesterday. 'Sleep with your windows open'. It was liked and shared by 2000 mosquitos."

"Can you fit our annual report into 140 characters or less?"

"Something has happened to the canary."

The twittering president.