Tweet Enthusiast Pillows

"I can offer a much less invasive treatment, but it wouldn't be nearly as interesting to tweet about."

'I have to tweet for help, so I need to let you go for just a minute.'

'I don't get it. They teach us spelling, grammar, and punctuation to prepare us for a world of tweets.'

'I got the ain't nobody reading my tweets blues.'

'We're looking for something that captures the zeitgeist of the nation...you know, the Great American Tweet.'

"Twitter is back! Hurry, hurry, get yer free speech here!"

'It's a tweet from Maid Marian.'

"He's so self-absorbed he follows his own Tweets."

"Help. I'm addicted to Twitter!"

The twittering president.

"Jeremy and I are so in sync, we finish each other's tweets."

USA allow additional execution methods...

"My Twitter account isn't too interesting. It's mostly just a bunch of threats."

"You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can be taken out of context and put on Twitter and then it'll be a whole thing."

'…and remember - around HERE, ‘talk is CHEEP'.'

'Unaccustomed as I am to public tweeting ... '

Meet the Tweeter 2-4

"He still has his followers - but they've moved to his Twitter."

"If you think you've earned this by consistently retweeting my tweets -- you're right."

"Honey, don't be silly. There's no such thing as Covfefe."

"Her first word was 'paparazzi'. "

21st century water cooler conversations.

'I guess mother and baby are doing fine. She's already sending out selfies.'

Giving birth with your husband present may be more painful.

"Could you please focus on the objective of this meeting, Tom... you can get back to your 300 followers later."

Digital Fomo!

"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."

"Waiter, can you heat this up? The wild salmon got cold while I was posting it to Instagram."

"What does it mean? Heck, I don't know! It's mystifying!"

"Before I do this, I would ask everyone to please delete the footage in the event of this not going as planned."

"And to my nephew, Todd, I leave my 27 Twitter followers."

Trick or Tweet

"Where have you been? This content's not going to create itself."

"I always send a layover selfie back home, to let everyone know I'm safe."

"She looks just like in your photos."