Tweet Enthusiast Gifts

"I can offer a much less invasive treatment, but it wouldn't be nearly as interesting to tweet about."

'I have to tweet for help, so I need to let you go for just a minute.'

'I don't get it. They teach us spelling, grammar, and punctuation to prepare us for a world of tweets.'

My Fair Lady Twitter

'I got the ain't nobody reading my tweets blues.'

'I caught you retweeting someone else's tweets!'

'We're looking for something that captures the zeitgeist of the nation...you know, the Great American Tweet.'

"Twitter is back! Hurry, hurry, get yer free speech here!"

'It's a tweet from Maid Marian.'

"So then I thought...who needs speech writers when I can just recite all my old tweets!"

This isn't a fortune in the cookie, it's a tweet!

"He's so self-absorbed he follows his own Tweets."

"Aw, come on, Dad. Just one more hilarious attack-tweet filled with misspellings, inaccuracies and nutty conspiracy theories?"

"Help. I'm addicted to Twitter!"

The twittering president.

"Jeremy and I are so in sync, we finish each other's tweets."

USA allow additional execution methods...

"My Twitter account isn't too interesting. It's mostly just a bunch of threats."

"You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can be taken out of context and put on Twitter and then it'll be a whole thing."

Follow Me on Twitter

Follow me on Twitter!

'…and remember - around HERE, ‘talk is CHEEP'.'

'Unaccustomed as I am to public tweeting ... '

Bloody Geronimo and his incessant Twitter!

"But the good news is Trump has broken off diplomatic relations with them only on Twitter..."

'I'm thinking of writing a tweet.'

Meet the Tweeter 2-4

People love Twitter because it's quick, requires little effort from writer or reader. You're suddenly so self-aware. House of Java.net Cybercafe. The other night, I was tweeting and I realized: Why send 280 characters when you can send only 279? So stop tweeting at 279. People go to the limit. But 280 characters is so … long. So 2017. it's practically a … sentence. Or, what's that other thing: Paragraph! Gasp.

I'm your ghost twitterer. It's a marketing vehicle for your radio show. You're stealing my identity because if you used your own, no one would follow your tweets! You've got 3,000 followers. They're living to read about your every movement. Beating on pause. Beating on pause.

Whoever said "Brevity is the soul of wit" must have not read many tweets!

"He still has his followers - but they've moved to his Twitter."

"If you think you've earned this by consistently retweeting my tweets -- you're right."

"Honey, don't be silly. There's no such thing as Covfefe."

"Her first word was 'paparazzi'. "

21st century water cooler conversations.