Tweeting Fanatic Pillows

"All this sitting and staring at my Twitter account is making me hungry!"

'Before I pass sentence, have you anything to tweet?'

"I'm leaving politics so I can spend more quality tweeting-time with my family."

"The leadership team wants a catchy acronym for a new social media app they're calling Functional Applied Relationship Tracker. Any suggestions?"

'…and remember - around HERE, ‘talk is CHEEP'.'

Obsession with the Internet.

"Twitter is back! Hurry, hurry, get yer free speech here!"

'The doctors say I have a rare illness that turns people into birds - it's untweetable.'

"Why would I want to see anything that far away from my phone?"

'We're looking for something that captures the zeitgeist of the nation...you know, the Great American Tweet.'

"My Twitter account isn't too interesting. It's mostly just a bunch of threats."

Football supporters.

"The Curse of the robot followers: At first, Rob was thrilled with the all the attention and followers."

'It's a tweet from Maid Marian.'

"Jeremy and I are so in sync, we finish each other's tweets."

"Tell the world, are you digging for world peace?"

"When did tweeting become such an angry thing?"

'What am I thinking? Don't you read my Tweets?'

"You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can be taken out of context and put on Twitter and then it'll be a whole thing."

"It's not enough -- others must follow me on social media."

"When I Say Tweet, You Say Tweet!"

"If you think you've earned this by consistently retweeting my tweets -- you're right."

'35,000 twitter followers, but no real friends...'

'Simendinger! Get back to your position and quit hassling the fans.'

The twittering president.

"Am I not being funny enough?"