Tv Viewer With A Twist Gifts

Man uses a television to hold up his book.

"And just like that, e got rid of Florida."

'In its new 'spirit of evenhandedness,' the U. S. Government today sent troops to occupy all foreign countries....'

"Let's go watch TV I hear there are bowl games on."

'There's nothing on.'

Tree house.

"Do you know any other songs besides the theme to The Andy Griffin Show?"

"For most people, the sense of panic will be mild."

'Och lye the news'

"I know he's funny, boy, but he’s also the president of the United States."

Please stand by. As stocks soar, our announcer is having a fit of the giggles.

"Would you mind adjusting the vibrate on your phone? There's a seismologist on TV claiming there's been an earthquake in our neighborhood."

'Your mom is probably watching. Go for the jugular.'

"Scientists confirmed today that everything we know about the structure of the universe is wrongedy-wrong-wrong."

"Remember—we're not Eagles fans or Patriots fans. We're Tom Brady Somehow Gets Humiliated fans."

'We couldn't give away black-and-white TVs until we started advertising them as having 'non multi-color capability'.'

Triceratops watching television with satellite dish made from own horns.

'Harry! - If you can hear me - what did you do with the remote!?'

"Or we could turn on the TV and let younger, more beautiful people have sex for us."

It's a Dog's life

"Then we agree. 10 minutes of your news, then 10 minutes of mine."

'I've seen nothing I've liked since Victor Meldrew!'

And here is the day's news that we are going shove down your throat.

"Sooner or later you just knew it had to come to this. . ."

'...According to the survey, Canadians prefer the doggie style positions, so the can both keep watching the Hockey game...'

'According to the latest reports, there were no earlier reports.'

"Today, in all aspects of life losses outnumbered gains."

"So much for finding intelligent life on this planet."

"I'm the bluebird of PMS. Fetch me some decaf and turn on the air conditioner. I'm burning up in here!"

'The opinions expressed by Burt are not necessarily those of Ernie.'

'The sword in the stone was just a warm-up - now you must remove this remote control ...'

Man and dog playing a car simulation. The dog has a fan to simulate his head out of the window.

"Dad, I was thinking...can I get a tattoo...right here!"

"This is Sally Whitgart on TV -- We now switch you to Bart Fribledale on the Internet...."