Vintage Tv Viewer Gifts

'We couldn't give away black-and-white TVs until we started advertising them as having 'non multi-color capability'.'

Joan Hickson

"Do you know any other songs besides the theme to The Andy Griffin Show?"

TV jester.

"I know he's funny, boy, but he’s also the president of the United States."

'Come quick: Rin Tin Tin is on TV again...'

"Your remote control, sire."

Man hitting a TV and going out of focus himself.

A man watches TV while wearing a Marshall McLuhan sweatshirt.

"It's overdosed on Parakeetamol."

'...According to the survey, Canadians prefer the doggie style positions, so the can both keep watching the Hockey game...'

The Bronze Age of Television

"Hey, you've fixed the telly too!"

Wild and crazy salmon

"Television repairs....Don't you want to see my identity?"

'We'll return to the evening news right after this message from the Three Stooges....'

"I like everything Big Bird's ever done."

In-flight entertainment

'I'm worried sick -- the King just ordered a bunch of Benny Hill DVD's!'

Miami Vice

"The news lady says this bad guy was charged with assault...but he didn't have rifle. How's that possible?!"

'Funny, it usually works OK after you've given it a hefty kick.'

Ironside / Iron Oxide.

Nostalgiaville

"Still pretty liberal."

"We didn't have telly in wartime, we had to make our own violence."

'Bush said Iraq is NOT in a civil war because there have been no sightings of 'Union' or 'Confederate' army flags.'

'You want me to be more like I was when we were first married? OK, I'll put away the remote and change it manually.'

'This must be world war II. It's in black and white.'