Tv Talent Junkie Gifts

"If there is no more American Idol what am I going to do to become famous?"

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

University Soapflakes

Marilyn Monroe - Spot the Difference

Stop! Stop what? Do not change the channel! Sex, death, harrowing footage of the most remarkable story you've ever seen, tattoos, rock-n-roll, action, action, action! It's all coming right up, right after this five second break for station identification. Five seconds ... You're watching Rock Television. And now back to our ... bored. Welcome to ABC. We've got thrills, action, more thrills ... Click. I've got your action right here. We've created a monster. Click click click click click cl-

"I always thought I'd be good at getting drunk and crying on camera for Bravo."

"Britain's Got Talent is now in its tenth astonishingly brilliant year!"

Dancing with the Star Wars

The President Elect approved by 3 out of 4 talk show hosts!

'Redneck Goldfish' Earl knew better than to watch Oprah while drinking.

'Breaking Bad' Box Set Addiction.

"Spoiler alert."

"Consider this job a reality show where you work your butt off 14 hours a day. If you win, you'll get a paycheck and the chance to do it all over again next week."

"Despite thoroughly scraping the celebrity barrel, that Orwellian nightmare Celebrity Big Brother is back on our screens again."

'I just love this new reality show, TRADING BANK ACCOUNTS!'

Prehistoric Peeps: Even the 'Derby' had its primeval counterpart.

Shopper in grocery store sees TV dinners marked daytime and prime time.

Lawn Order. It's a landscaping show about maintaining a tidy yard.

Mog The Week

nstead of looking at fish bowl, a kid watches the fish on TV as they are being video taped.

'Maybe getting gordon ramsay to do the after dinner speech wasn't such a good idea after all!'

"There's more to life than beer and football...I just can remember what it is."

Frank and Ernie's Poetry Corner. Robert Frost. TV Guide. I think I'll watch some late-night comedy

"Can't stop watching. That ribbon is amaaazing..."

"What's the best way to break up a marriage?"

"Well, you gonna spin?" "Ah, maybe after another Breaking Bad."

"Say hi to your mother for me and tell her I'm happy her bypass turned out O.K

"We interrupt this advertisement to bring you another advertisement that has just been rushed to the studio."

"I understand they've uncovered some weird new side effects since you were here last."

'Oh No! Reality theatre.'

America's funniest investment scams

'He's in training for the Olympics'

How to get on talk shows by promoting your new book

"Since you ask, when I'm through here I go home and listen to a bunch of mindless crap on TV."

'What shall we watch - best security videos of 2013 or operating room bloopers, blunders and bleeps?'