Tv Junkie Gifts

The movie was over. But not for Bob.

Life is better with a laugh track and graphics.

"I see myself as a lot like Garbo, but very much a people person!"

America's funniest investment scams

"There's more to life than beer and football...I just can remember what it is."

'He's in training for the Olympics'

How to get on talk shows by promoting your new book

'Harry's in his cultural center.'

TV says 'Watch me!'

TV Remote control user is zapped by his telly

"Mind if I change melons?"

"Go back to bed or we'll make you watch Jay Leno."

"'60 Minutes' is on."

"Cut to commercial! For pity's sake, cut to commercial!"

"Got to go. Somebody found the remote."

"Say hi to your mother for me and tell her I'm happy her bypass turned out O.K

"Honey, Clay Buchholz is about to cement a Cy Young!"

"Since you ask, when I'm through here I go home and listen to a bunch of mindless crap on TV."

"Have you tried lying around watching crappy TV?"

"Can't stop watching. That ribbon is amaaazing..."

"No, I'm really into this series. I am just not into you making a very poor attempt at copying their British accent every waking minute until we finish it."

A car drives down a street of houses all shaped like TV sets

"It's all the violence that does it."

A day without cable ends badly.

Wall mountable TVs.

Shopper in grocery store sees TV dinners marked daytime and prime time.

'Films on Freeview - the number of times we've seen them it should be called 'Fourview'.'

'Welcome to the Ambulance Chasing Network... Have you or someone you love taken Zerkzes pills in the past six-months?'

Man sawing a woman in half and removing a television

Note to viewers: We've cut back on sexual content by replacing it with violence.

Three bears watching Porridge on three different size tvs,

'You called about digital cable?'

"More rubbish on the T

"Mom? Why is the television so fat?..."

'The following program was made possible by canceling an even WORSE program.'