Tv Schedules Gifts

"He's still planning what to watch on TV tonight."

'Hurry, wipe it off before Dad comes home!'

'It's midnight, do you know where your brain is?'

"If you wish to manifest here, you'll have to change. We don't allow anything past 1950."

"That concludes our broadcast day. Go to bed."

"Oh, goody. More reality-based crap."

Shopper in grocery store sees TV dinners marked daytime and prime time.

'Time for my favorite soap opera, Nine Lives to Live.'

Bathroom shelf full of clocks and pills.

'So, ten thousand pounds could be yours if you call in and answer this question...Why the hell aren't you in bed?!'

"We can't turn back the clock. Trust me, I tried. It really messes up your schedule."

The Incredible Telly Presenter's Journey.

Wonder woman as an old person.

Professor in time machine at the end of a battle "Damn watch!"

'Ready, steady, Operate'

TV scheduler's garbage in and garbage out baskets..

"Come on, Baldo...get up. It's twenty to eleven."

'Why do they call them 'soaps'? All they do is dig up dirt.'

'We've got too many sitcoms, Miss Dudley -- pull the laugh tracks on half of them and run them as soaps.'

"Do you suppose I could enjoy 'Dynasty' without listening to an hour of suspender-snapping?"

"Henry is addicted to all of the Court programs."

'There's no decent comedy on TV nowadays. Why don't they bring back Mr Blobby?'

"Don't be long, Dear, you don't want to miss Celebrity Hari Kari on TV."

"I wonder what happened in all those other timelines?"

"He loves watching daytime shows where people throw a lot of hissy fits."

'Even the TV dinners are a repeat.'

'So! You're still watching those talk shows after I told you to stop!'

"Should we watch the lighthearted workplace comedy or the dystopian workplace drama?"

Items From the Jay Leno Fan Club

'We'll dress them up as characters from musicals, make them live in a lighhthouse with an antelope ... it's reality TV at its best.'

"Every day at five. Like clockwork."