Tv Adviser Gifts

"We advised viewer discretion and they all decided not to watch."

"Then we have an unspoken agreement?"

'How many times have I told to seize the day before it seizes you?'

'Negotiations have reached an impasse, legal recommends we resort to violence.'

"Give a man a fish and you feed him for the day. Teach a man to fish and you can charge a consulting fee."

'Answer these constituents letters. Tell them to go to hell in a nice way.'

"Remember, Man of good Sense not here to do work on your behalf. Man of good Sense only here to help you on strategic level until you wise enough to overcome recession."

"I became a mentor because I needed more direction in life."

"I can definitely give you my two cents, Sir – just let me know how you want it: Bitcoin, Paypal, or Venmo."

HUAWEI 5G

"At least he's honest about it..."

Overdose of election campaign ads on TV.

'If you can't afford a media adviser the court will appoint you one.'

'Where you went wrong' Desk.

'My husband likes to have everything handy during TV commercials.'

"Every single day, guys ask you for advice about women, work, sports... Haven't you ever even heard of the law of supply and demand?. . .I'd be glad to steer the downtrodden and the forlorn your way for a mere 82% of the man-to-man-talk fee."

"And this is my cousin Dave, who handles the conventional wisdom."

'It basically boils down to you need to do stuff better.'

Don't forget to read the small print.

"The peasants have lost all respect for the moat."

'It's just until the election is over, but I'm replacing you with Dick Morris.'

'No comment for now, but there will be a press leak at four.'

"When I want your advice, I'll ask for it... but in an oblique, face-saving way."

"The steering-committee three are we. Run it by us, and we'll see."

"I need advice and you seem to have a level head."

"Don't you shush us, mister! We're famous consultants!"

"Oh, you don't need to fight them—you just need to convince the pitchfork people that the torch people want to take away their pitchforks."

Andrew Marr

In a Quandary

Our succession plan is we don't talk about it!

'I think I've spotted our problem.' (too many consultants)

Holding the moral high ground

'Remember, Spivack - laugh and the world laughs with you. Cry and it moves in for the kill.'