Tv Strategist Gifts

'The only spot we could get was opposite American Idol and it died a quick death.'

"There's no such thing as 'bad publicity'." "All traffic is good traffic."

The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."

"The leadership team wants a catchy acronym for a new social media app they're calling Functional Applied Relationship Tracker. Any suggestions?"

A Hole in the Dike

Burger Queen: The Patriarchy is Dead.

"Brilliant report, I can't tell where the facts and the fiction begins"

'Let me see your portfolio of stolen ideas.'

'He's written some great slogans and some great labels, but he's never written a great coupon.'

"I believe it took a team of twenty five, working six months at a cost of �250, 000 to come up with that."

"When we changed the company name, the stocks went through the roof!"

"Skip the funny voices tonight—O.K., Dad?"

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"I'm spending more time promoting myself than I am being myself."

"Well, sir, it looks like things are getting pretty serious for Peter and Pauline."

"Welcome back to the We Were Bored and Had Nothing Else To Do podcast."

Internet Cafe.

"Oh, and add a couple of intentional typos to my weekly email update...I want to appear warm and authentic!!"

"Last week on 'Top Surgeon' Erica won immunity, while Carl was sent home for killing his patient during routine gallbladder surgery."

'We're losing the mid-morning market. Let's put a hamburger in a glazed donut and call it brunch.'

"Anyone can dream the impossible dream. We need to sell the impossible dream."

Elon Musk Ditches Twitter Logo

'My husband likes to have everything handy during TV commercials.'

"Can you do battle with him later?... He's watching, 'Game of Thrones'."

'Our company needs a tougher image. So from here on out we'll answer the phone with the greeting, 'what the hell do you want?!'

TV Situations vacant.

"Right, I think I'll call it fire, now I just need to work out how to monetise it

Peace on Earth

Turning 'Raw Hype' Into 'Pure Hype'

"Terri and Kip make up our crazy dreamer imagineering department. Al is our get-realinator."

"See! Thousands of new listeners."

'It's the philosophy of the company that truth in advertising begins at home.'

"I've decided to redefine as a GREAT artist."

'The times they are a-changin'.'

"I can't wait to see our new ad campaign. Wait, don't tell me...it's NEW and IMPROVED!"