Turtle Tease Gifts

The Stripper

'Any minute now I'll be getting a headache.'

'Wow, these lights stay on the red cycle for a very long time.'

Turtle Trailer Court

'Your Honor, my client would like to wave his right to a speedy trial.'

Vinnie's Repossessions: A Turtle has just had his shell repossessed

"As you can see, our corporate structure is turtles all the way down."

"Well, if you didn't do anything in North Korea, then why do they keep launching missiles at us?"

You'll see the food is excellent, but the service is far too slow....

Well, the doctor said you have to wear it until you stop biting your stitches.

Ike and Tina Turtle.

"All good Lucy, I've cleared the beach: you can safely go and lay your eggs now..."

"We haven't danced in ages."

'And I thought I had a big egg to lay.'

'He won't eat his lettuce until I've washed it five times. I'm sure his OCD is getting worse!'

'An this good luck charm is to commemorate when our turtle ran away. He's the one who took Jim's pinkie.'

"The doc says I won't even make it another 45 years."

Here is our spot, I sink, Helga.

Honestly, I don't know why I even bring Harold to parties.

Tortoise polishing his shell

'Sorry, he can't come out and play. He's grounded.'

Tortoises breakdancing

'That's one of those May-December love affairs. He's 251 years old, and she can't be a day over 135!'

"I've been really craving Italian food for months now. Can you grab me two kilos of rigatoni, three kilos of fettuccini, and a bigger shell? The one I have is feeling a bit too tight lately."

'Sorry there's no food. We were kind of hoping you'd bring some.'

"And another thing, it's real cool in the summer!"

'I'm going to be a little late.'

'Look Mummy: I've put on my shell all by myself...'

"Hey, no kidding! I prefer slow dancing, too!"

Turtle Home

"After losing my partner, I felt lost until I realized I had not only an empty shell but also a short-term accommodation business."

"A man threatens to destroy town with army of turtles after dispute with city hall. Local authorities initiate a shell-ter in place in preparation for the noc-turtle invasion."

'Don't worry Darling, they're scientists'

"My doctor told me to get more exercise by walking a pet, but he didn't specify it had to be a dog."

Funky Facts: Turtles.