Turtle Tale Lover Gifts

"Ah - This Must Be My 2006"

"Read me that new turtle book that's getting all the buzz."

'Br'er Fox said 'I'm going to throw you into the briar patch'...And Br'er Rabbit said, 'Please,please don't taser me!''

A small snooker player chalking his cue.

'Wow, these lights stay on the red cycle for a very long time.'

Turtle Trailer Court

'Your Honor, my client would like to wave his right to a speedy trial.'

Vinnie's Repossessions: A Turtle has just had his shell repossessed

"As you can see, our corporate structure is turtles all the way down."

"Well, if you didn't do anything in North Korea, then why do they keep launching missiles at us?"

'I thought I would rent it out for the extra dough.'

'And I thought I had a big egg to lay.'

Ike and Tina Turtle.

"All good Lucy, I've cleared the beach: you can safely go and lay your eggs now..."

Alice in Wonderland: Alice and the Dodo.

"We haven't danced in ages."

You'll see the food is excellent, but the service is far too slow....

Well, the doctor said you have to wear it until you stop biting your stitches.

'An this good luck charm is to commemorate when our turtle ran away. He's the one who took Jim's pinkie.'

'He won't eat his lettuce until I've washed it five times. I'm sure his OCD is getting worse!'

"The doc says I won't even make it another 45 years."

Tortoises breakdancing

'Sorry, he can't come out and play. He's grounded.'

'That's one of those May-December love affairs. He's 251 years old, and she can't be a day over 135!'

"I've been really craving Italian food for months now. Can you grab me two kilos of rigatoni, three kilos of fettuccini, and a bigger shell? The one I have is feeling a bit too tight lately."

"You have to practice because if the Devil challenges you to a fiddle contest and wins, he gets your soul."

'Face it, we're vegetarians because plants can't toddle away.'

A hard green shell on the outside doesn't always mean it's chocolaty on the inside.

"...and the dung was this big!.... No...elephant, actually."

Here is our spot, I sink, Helga.

Honestly, I don't know why I even bring Harold to parties.

"And another thing, it's real cool in the summer!"

'I'm going to be a little late.'

"A man threatens to destroy town with army of turtles after dispute with city hall. Local authorities initiate a shell-ter in place in preparation for the noc-turtle invasion."

'Look Mummy: I've put on my shell all by myself...'