Turtle Lover Gifts

Look who's religious all of a sudden

'He's never been the same since he came out of his shell.'

Turtle to counselor: 'If you don't mind I won't lay on my back.'

'Looks like Joanie lost another turtle.'

'He's responding well to the injections'.

'Oh Frank, let's not swim here: It looks like a nudist-beach...'

'He was only ninety three.'

"My activity tracker helps me reach my goal of 10 steps per day."

Turtle Eviction

"What did I say about trying to do sit-ups?"

"I just installed a home security monitor."

'Hey buddy, want to race me?'

'Sorry son, I bought you an ice-cream at the corner shop, but it melted on the way home...'

'My doctor told me that I need to slow down. But I don't think I can.'

'Body-building is great, unfortunately, now I'm stuck in my shell...'

'I guess we both enjoy long slow walks together.'

Lovely tan-lines George, lovely!

A turtle is pulling a shell as a camper

'Wow, these lights stay on the red cycle for a very long time.'

'It was your bright idea to eat out!'

'I can't believe you only lasted 3 days, 9 hours and 56 minutes.'

Give me a lift and I'll pay in Canadian currency!

Turtle crashes, deploys airbag.

'Do you have anything that will stop him chasing cars?'

European Turtles

"Yes, he is a bit slow, but he's really careful and I've been assured that I'll have him for a long time."

"I like a speed."

"Walt won't be at work today - he's flipped on his back!"

"In 275 years, I've seen it all - fish, water, more fish, more water..."

A turtle takes a bath.

"Why would I sign up for a marathon? Well, Coubertin said it best: "the most important thing is not to win, but to take part"..."

Turtle Crossing

A tortoise

"All good Lucy, I've cleared the beach: you can safely go and lay your eggs now..."

"A man threatens to destroy town with army of turtles after dispute with city hall..."