Turtle Tale Lover Pillows

"Ah - This Must Be My 2006"

"Read me that new turtle book that's getting all the buzz."

'Br'er Fox said 'I'm going to throw you into the briar patch'...And Br'er Rabbit said, 'Please,please don't taser me!''

A small snooker player chalking his cue.

'Wow, these lights stay on the red cycle for a very long time.'

'Your Honor, my client would like to wave his right to a speedy trial.'

"As you can see, our corporate structure is turtles all the way down."

Vinnie's Repossessions: A Turtle has just had his shell repossessed

"Well, if you didn't do anything in North Korea, then why do they keep launching missiles at us?"

'I thought I would rent it out for the extra dough.'

Alice in Wonderland: Alice and the Dodo.

You'll see the food is excellent, but the service is far too slow....

Ike and Tina Turtle.

"We haven't danced in ages."

'And I thought I had a big egg to lay.'

"All good Lucy, I've cleared the beach: you can safely go and lay your eggs now..."

'An this good luck charm is to commemorate when our turtle ran away. He's the one who took Jim's pinkie.'

"The doc says I won't even make it another 45 years."

'He won't eat his lettuce until I've washed it five times. I'm sure his OCD is getting worse!'

"I've been really craving Italian food for months now. Can you grab me two kilos of rigatoni, three kilos of fettuccini, and a bigger shell? The one I have is feeling a bit too tight lately."

A hard green shell on the outside doesn't always mean it's chocolaty on the inside.

"You have to practice because if the Devil challenges you to a fiddle contest and wins, he gets your soul."

Here is our spot, I sink, Helga.

'That's one of those May-December love affairs. He's 251 years old, and she can't be a day over 135!'

'Sorry, he can't come out and play. He's grounded.'

'Face it, we're vegetarians because plants can't toddle away.'

Tortoises breakdancing

"...and the dung was this big!.... No...elephant, actually."

"And another thing, it's real cool in the summer!"

'I'm going to be a little late.'

"Hey, no kidding! I prefer slow dancing, too!"

"A man threatens to destroy town with army of turtles after dispute with city hall. Local authorities initiate a shell-ter in place in preparation for the noc-turtle invasion."

"After losing my partner, I felt lost until I realized I had not only an empty shell but also a short-term accommodation business."

'Look Mummy: I've put on my shell all by myself...'