Turnpike Traveler Gifts

Sporting snobs talk about hunting on turnpike roads

Unable to raise enough money for a trip to Paris, the Bartlesville High French Club had to settle for three days in Tulsa.

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

"The GPS works great, we have satellite TV installed, the Sirius stereo sounds fantastic and our every move is tracked by Qualcomm. But could you turn around? I left me iphone at the house. . ."

"Oh indeed I did: I went feral for a year when I was young. It taught me a lot about the world, but about myself too..."

"Yes, six to seven weeks is my life expectancy! Once I learned that, I thought, the hell with it, I'll stop working and start travelling..."

"I think our smart home is suffering from separation anxiety. It's following us."

'You want a quick read? How about this one: 'Memoirs of an Amnesic'?'

Rock - see you in a million years!

"Legs together, David -- You're hamspreading again."

Vaccination Passport

Lenin, Anticipating His Arrival at Finland Station, Sees His Baggage Taken Off at Beloostrov.

"Valet park only"

Lanes Closed for the Hell of It

"The guide book sys it's the best B.&B. in the Carpathians."

A white collar cow.

'Calm down...it's probably just another mirage.'

Musical genres

'Gasview Hotel' - 'Dinerview Gas' - 'Motelview Diner' - 'Hiwayview Suites'

When travelling with her cat by plane, train, or bus, dawn always ensured no one would bother them.

'Bed & Bagel'

Rail travel - the environmental alternative (that sometimes doesn't allow bikes)

"You've traveled all this way just to score some pot? Okay—How much do you want?"

Busking during a pandemic

'It's a great job, but the commuting is murder!'

First Transsylvanian Blood Bank

Musical Bicycle.

'Anything to declare?'

'And upon landing the pilot will give everyone in first class a hug.'

Miniature Trailer on Desert Island

History Department: 'I used to be a revisionist myself, you know!'

A guy fills up his camel with H2O in the desert.

Of course, Hal rented a car with economy gps.

Notice to travelers: 'Delayed' is the New 'on time'.

Commuter doing some gardening on the train