Trusty Traveler Gifts

"I'd be no kind of Christian if I left a disabled guy and his sleepy friend out in the rain - hop in!"

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

"The GPS works great, we have satellite TV installed, the Sirius stereo sounds fantastic and our every move is tracked by Qualcomm. But could you turn around? I left me iphone at the house. . ."

Road sign: 'No Passing Zone... This, too, shall pass.'

"Oh indeed I did: I went feral for a year when I was young. It taught me a lot about the world, but about myself too..."

"Yes, six to seven weeks is my life expectancy! Once I learned that, I thought, the hell with it, I'll stop working and start travelling..."

"I'm TRYING to extinguish my ego, but I feel so CONSPICUOUS up here!"

"Legs together, David -- You're hamspreading again."

'You want a quick read? How about this one: 'Memoirs of an Amnesic'?'

Vaccination Passport

Lenin, Anticipating His Arrival at Finland Station, Sees His Baggage Taken Off at Beloostrov.

'St. Joseph's Church,today's sermon, the road to heaven (free maps)'

A white collar cow.

'Calm down...it's probably just another mirage.'

'Phone for help? Are you mad? Have you any idea how much it costs to use a mobile abroad?'

"Yipeee!"

'It's a great job, but the commuting is murder!'

Rail travel - the environmental alternative (that sometimes doesn't allow bikes)

When travelling with her cat by plane, train, or bus, dawn always ensured no one would bother them.

"You've traveled all this way just to score some pot? Okay—How much do you want?"

'Anything to declare?'

A guy fills up his camel with H2O in the desert.

On Holiday

'And upon landing the pilot will give everyone in first class a hug.'

'You know, if we had a bed and breakfast, we could use it ourselves!'

Miniature Trailer on Desert Island

John was bck from extended leave, but he hadn't quite got in the swing of things yet.

Of course, Hal rented a car with economy gps.

Notice to travelers: 'Delayed' is the New 'on time'.

Nativity Scene on the Underground

Commuter doing some gardening on the train

'I told you you should have bought a sat nav...!'

Bev puts on an old favorite

"I have this nagging feeling we've forgotten something..."

"How much if I pedal?"