Treadmill Humorist Gifts

JOE'S BAR: Treadmill available: relax, while it walks your dog'

'I used to run. Now I power walk.'

Bobby's pitching coach told him to put some stank on the ball.

'I just don't feel I'm getting anywhere.'

'It's not meant to be a fold up bike, but the truck driver I held up for seven miles thought otherwise.'

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

Carrot in front of the donkey workout.

Electric Blanket.

'Looks like Shelia has overdone it with the cream scones this week!'

Walking To School Simulator

"Our new treadmill is easy to use, you just set it to the speed setting that's most comfortable for you."

Olympic Torch Training

Hello-BUNS OF STEEL?

Cyclist Flamingoes

"All those years of dodging taxes and chasing investment yield have kept me in top shape, right?"

Rugby - Interesting line-out tactics.

Very drunk professional cyclist

The trick to losing weight is to eat a small portion and wait 10 minutes. By then your resolve has caught up with your appetite!

"My doctor told me I should start working out."

'Fred, didn't I tell you to wear a helmet?'

Pole jumper about to land on a giant whoopi cushion.

Football Violence

"Which was harder to work out - quantum physics or his wife's mind"

Caution: high speed treadmill, hole in wall behind it

"It's improv night."

"Junior, there's more to life than winning. There's also beating the spread."

'But, dear, I am walking the dog.'

"It was a slow day - my pedometer says I only put in 1,273,426 steps."

Bull Treadmill

A man with a deflated bicycle stands in line at the tire inflator.

At the baby oil factory.

10 reasons why cricket is not a real sport.

'If I get dizzy, and pass out there's a cherry danish in my lunch box.'