Trash Tamer Gifts

Recycling point.

"Remember...when the going gets tough...DELEGATE!"

Multi-tasking.

'Cat or dog?' - 'A little of both.'

'I think we'd be more confident about meeting our targets if we could work out what they were!'

Mechanic looking under the hood of a car.

'No, that wasn't your mother calling to ask if you were okay. That was your mother calling to ask if I was okay.'

". . . so, all I really need to do is change one word."

"Good news. It wasn't a toxic chemical leak. It was an old pizza in your kid's room."

Gardener's Calendar: Try to put the other things back...

New Swiss Army Knife

Parenting Business Deals

'Yes sir, I'll get right on it. Would you like it done with or without gusto?'

"Just put that in my, 'I'll get to it when I can, I'm only human' pile."

'Look! It's superwoman...and all her assistants!'

'Welcome aboard, Bob. Your job is to figure out what the hell happened here.'

'They've been in there all day writing the job description.'

'Watch what you admit to. He once tried to fine one of my clients for looking a gift horse in the mouth.'

"Slide, Howie!!! Slide!"

"I wish he'd slow the hell down." "I wish he'd hurry the hell up."

"Well, you know what they say —'The water's always bluer on the other side of the trash fence.'"

"Most projects require three hands."

"It seems that your body is adjusting itself to the amount of multitasking you've been doing."

'I'd like the short form instead...'

Overwhelmed by Paperwork

'Miscellaneous' and 'Non-Miscellaneous' trays

Paper Trail

He collects a wide range of tackle and knows precisely how to use it.

'Now, you'd better pick up your toys or no bath!'

"You goo-goo, you gaa-gaa. But when push comes to shove, you whaa-whaa."

'It's an emergency! The sitter wants to know where Marmaduke's doggie treats are!'

"What am I up to? I'm collecting human rubbish floating on the ocean and I'll dump it in front of their parliament!"

Tax grab.

"Now are you convinced that the tax simplification plan will work?"