Traffic Law Nerd Pillows

I'm giving you a ticket!

'I'm sorry, Mr. Miller, but providing information in a hit and run fender-bender case doesn't qualify you for the Federal Witness Protection Program.'

"I believe you to be over our new drink-drive limits, and require you to blow into this..!"

'Have a heart, officer... the little mite is starving!'

'Oh no a speed camera.'

'So then. The handsome p.c. noticed that the tax disc on Cinderella's pumpkin carriage was well out of date.'

"According to the breathalyzer, the wine definitely represents your blood."

"I'd like to give you a break, but we did have you doing a hundred and eighty-six thousand miles a second on the radar."

Man in car sees fallen sign on the hood of his car which says, CAUTION sign-holding road worker falls asleep.

At the gallery of Fine Art.

"For your information, officer, I was not ‘texting’ – I was reviewing candidate applications for fellowship grants!"

Watch out for the traffic rules! Especially in other countries!

'You were nagging your husband all over the road. I'll need to see your marriage license.'

"You were doing the speed limit. I found that suspicious."

'Good thing your car was stationary when it hit me.'

'On the Highway of Life, Broderick Crawford is always pulling me over.'

"Lollipop man, dear.. what lollipop man?"

All-way stops.

Tomorrow would be a lucrative day foe the Indianapolis Police Department.

"I've caught you not stopping at a red light."

'So how do you like the new job?' - 'Not bad, better than walking the streets.'

Lawyer Xing

'Speeding? Of course I was speeding! I have to make over a billion deliveries in one night!'

'I'll do the talking.'

"I don't care how it works where you come from....on this planet, the designated driver is the one who 'doesn't' drive!"

No Parking.

'Surely you can't book me for laughing, officer'

UFO at the traffic lights...

"It was green when I went through it."

How many pints have you had, son? Only two, semi-skimmed.

"No, no... your driver license."

Sp££d Camera

'How fast? Maybe you had the radar gun upside down and it was an airplane.'

Indians waiting at traffic lights to attack stagecoach.

'If you can read this you're too close.'